Saturday on the Homestead, May 17, 2014

Day 10 of my brown recluse spider bite:

The affected area seems to have gotten a tiny bit smaller, as if healing may have begun.  It is still an open sore, which is what forms after the expected blister breaks open.  One thing I have learned is that these bites do not go away quickly, be they treated by doctors or at home naturally.  Due to our faith in the power of essential oils and herbs to treat this particular ailment, I have elected to not have it treated by a physician.  If at any time I felt like what we were doing wasn't working, I would go to the doctor as needed.

The good news is that it IS working;  I have no apparent necrosis or infection.  For those who doubted that God-provided herbs and oils are never as effective as going to the doctor, I am living proof that they are, if not even better at times.  For those interested in our chosen plan of attack, we have been treating it with tea tree oil, lavender oil, oregano oil, and activated charcoal and wrapping me up with an ace bandage to hold another bandage in place.  When Jeff is home, he treats it several times a day, and when he is at work, Amber treats it a couple of times a day.  This path has been way less traumatic than having a doctor digging out dead flesh several times and taking massive doses of antibiotics and who knows what else. 

The not so good part is that I have not been able to get very much done in my garden for the past week and a half, and I haven't been able to finish up tilling and planting my beds.  To be honest, this has kept me fighting a dose of depression and feelings of uselessness.  My children came to my rescue today and weeded the beds I haven't been able to plant, so at least they are looking better, which makes me feel better.  Did I mention I love them and how they help out around here?!

Tonight, we are having spaghetti and homemade sauce that has been cooking in the crockpot all day, along with the Greek salad we love, to go with our family movie night watching Courageous.  We love that movie.  I hope you all have a marvelous and blessed rest of the weekend.  

and Friday night date night with the love of my life.....

Blessings,
Debbie, Home at Serenity Springs

Saturday on the Homestead, May 10, 2014

I woke up Thursday morning with an interesting small bruise on the edge of my back near my ribs.  This spot became more and more painful as the day wore on, until I couldn't even sit back on it while sitting down.  At some point that day, I began to wonder what in the world was going on, and then I remembered that I had taken a dead spider off my pillow when I made my bed.  I hadn't really thought twice about it up to that point.

Turns out, I have been bitten by a brown recluse; one of the more serious spider bites you can have.  The worst thing about it so far is the unending severe pain on that side, and the fact that it is in such an awkward place that I can't get comfortable enough to go to sleep.  My family has been treating me with clays and essential oils every couple of hours.

I can't really get anything done around the house with the pain being so consuming, which is a bummer.  I hope that it heals more quickly than the stories I have read, because I have a lot to do!  And I miss taking care of my husband and family already, and it has only been 3 days.

I would appreciate your prayers for healing as we continue to treat this.  I probably won't be posting much until I feel better.

Here is a current picture of my bite.  I will update as we treat it and see changes.  (The black spots are activated charcoal, not rotting skin!)

Blessings,
Debbie, Home at Serenity Springs

For Married Men Who Love Their Wives

Obviously, from the title, this blog post is for married men.  I don't normally target men specifically, but this was on my heart, and whatever God puts on my heart, I blog about.  I have previously stated my desire and my heart to strengthen and uphold marriages through exhortation and encouragement.  Through God's guiding and encouraging hand, my own marriage is blessed and hopefully His message can help others as well.

Good marriages don't just happen, especially in today's world.  Daily attention and care and proactive thinking is a MUST for marriages to thrive and succeed.  Men, I hope that you take this message to heart, because it can truly revolutionize not only your private, personal world, but also the relationship you have with your wife, and ultimately will bless your children as well. 

It doesn't take a genius to figure out that media takes extreme advantage of a man's God-given, visually driven nature.  Not only the media, but the women who see the media and then adopt the visual presentation of the women they constantly see.  In other words, we have lots of vamps and tramps running around, and bare skin abounds.

Men who don't restrict what goes before their eyes are bombarded daily with sights that a married man doesn't need to behold.  This can be detrimental to marital expectations for several reasons; one being that the majority of women don't come close to resembling the airbrushed, hyper-sexual women of the world, so you are left feeling dissatisfied with the woman you already have.  Secondly, if you are thinking about another woman, you are not thinking about your wife.  If you are a Christian man in particular, your wife is the only woman you need to be thinking about and admiring sexually.

Your expectation can be raised by actively viewing and thinking about the seductive images around you.  I would credit this with a lot of the extramarital affairs that are happening.  After viewing hundreds of attractive images via internet, television, movies, Facebook, Instagram, or perhaps women jogging half-clothed on the side of the road, a man starts to feel dissatisfied with the imperfect woman that he already has, and thus begins the downhill slide to finding someone more enticing to engage, flirt with, and eventually sleep with - if not in reality, at least in thought, which makes you just as culpable of adultery as the act itself.

As a man, when you refuse to discipline your eyes and thoughts away from the tempting images around you, you will become more critical when assessing your wife, and she will normally fall short of the unrealistic expectation in your head.  You will then start to pull away emotionally and sexually, and your wife will be left feeling dissatisfied, hurt, and unloved.   God created you to be monogamous in every way, visually, mentally, and in real every day life.  Something will remain missing in the intimacy of your marriage as long as you allow yourself to roam in any way.

If the issues are not addressed, affairs and/or divorce will ensue.   That is why it is of the utmost importance that you realize that you are in a war for your very SOUL and your MARRIAGE.  Indulging your flesh is never worth the ultimate consequences, and disciplining your flesh is always worth the blessing of a renewed mind and marriage.

And your mind CAN be renewed if you have been indulging in things you shouldn't.  The Bible instructs us to take every thought captive and make it obedient to Christ.  So when an inappropriate thought pops into your head, replace it with thoughts of your wife or thoughts of God.  Speak truth to yourself.  Speak scripture to yourself.  When you have worked on retraining your mind, it will become easier to be obedient.

One would almost think that affairs and divorce are unavoidable these days, but I absolutely disagree.  A person could also think that due to society men don't really have a choice about running around in a perpetual state of lust.  With this, I also firmly and resolutely disagree, because scripture tells us differently  We are commanded to take every thought captive and make it obedient to His word.  That means it CAN and SHOULD be done every minute of every day.

I realize that with any seductive image or live person, a man will have an automatic, physical desire to look further and even to lust.  At this point, a man can  (and should) choose to bounce his eyes away and refocus his thoughts on something acceptable.  He could even immediately call his wife and engage her in conversation. 

My husband has stated that he would even go so far as to switch lanes at a gas station or grocery store if he feels that it would be too difficult to focus elsewhere.  This is an example of the pro-active measures that should be taken to help you on your journey to renewing your mind and placing hedges around yourself to help avoid temptation.

Duck Dynasty brother Alan uses what he calls the "'notice-dismiss" method.  When something passes your vision that you can't help but see because you aren't blind, you immediately and purposefully dismiss it - visually, by looking away, and mentally, by deliberately thinking something Godly.  One male pastor stated that he prays for that woman's salvation as well. 

As believers, it is important to understand that each of those immodest women have eternal souls, and are probably dressing to get attention either because they are very insecure about themselves, because they have been trained from a young age to believe that her body is what makes her valuable, or are actually an instrument of Satan to get you to stumble. 

A man who truly desires to not fall into this potential affair-laden (again, either physical or mental) trap will be willing to go to extreme measures to ensure that he doesn't, even if like Joseph of the Bible you have to FLEE.  Sometimes this is actually the wisest option.  And this, men, is how you can begin to rejuvenate and protect yourself and your marriage from destruction.  Because the lust game may be temporarily pleasurable, but it never ends well.  Like never.

And if you end up with the person you lusted after and dabbled with, guess what?  They are imperfect humans too, and they will age, get wrinkles, warts, moles, gain weight, get gray hair, or be extremely hateful, jealous, money hungry, or angry.  Then you will have to move on to your next "perfectly sexy" person, and the cycle will never end, and your soul will never be satisfied.  Because sex outside of the sanctity of marriage is just that - an empty, fleeting pleasure that will not leave you satisfied.

If you would never have an actual, physical affair, but you don't mind indulging your flesh by feasting on the tempting images around you, be they real people or digital images, you are still violating the trust your wife should be able to have in you, whether she ever knows about it or not. 

Just as a person can say "no, thanks" to something offered to them that he doesn't need or want, you can say a resounding "NO!" to giving in to lust and becoming just another typical perpetually- aroused male, knowing that there is a greater reward to a cleansed mind focused SOLELY on your wife.  You will be surprised just how desirable and attractive she becomes when you commit to being a one-woman man, in thought and deed.

This is a message many women want their men to hear.  Our hearts cry out for you to desire us only.  We don't want to believe the lie that "men will be men."  Because we know that it really is a lie, and a very convenient excuse for men to do what they want.

You may not know any men who are obedient in this area, so you may think it simply isn't possible.  There are men like this, because we know some, and I am married to one.  He wasn't always that way, but he has become obedient to God in that area.  It can be done, if you are willing to begin the process of self-discipline, denying your flesh, and placing purposeful hedges around yourself by not allowing yourself access to areas that cause you to stumble.

Know your weaknesses and avoid troublesome habits, places, or people that bring out those weaknesses.  If Facebook causes you to stumble, only Facebook around your wife or stop Facebooking.  Same strategy applies to everything else that tempts you the most.  Jesus told us to be SEVERE in our strategies to rein in our flesh and sin.

You can be the reason your marriage survives rather than fails.  The heart and trust of a wife is worth far more than any fleeting pleasure.  Start your walk of obedience in these areas today.  Your mind will thank you.  Your soul will thank you.  Your wife will thank you and she will rejoice in a man that has eyes for her only, and will love you unguardedly in return. 

Please share this with someone who needs it.

Blessings on you and your marriage,
Debbie, Home at Serenity Springs

Saturday on the Homestead: April 26, 2014

Good morning!  I find it utterly amazing that this is the last Saturday in April!  My oldest daughter is going to turn 23 in a little over a week!  I think someone sped up the rotation of the Earth, as time seems to just fly by these days.  Gone are the days wishing time away like I did when I was younger.  Every moment is precious now, and I want to use them all wisely.

Jeff had to work very early today, so we stayed the night at my mother's house last night.  This has a two-fold blessing:  one, I am available to help my sister with my parents or the house, and two, Jeff is only 10-15 minutes from work instead of 45.  We have some errands to run when he gets off work, including a Lowe's run for some sealant for our greenhouse roof.  As often is the case, we may stop for a wee date while we are out.  We do cherish our time together.  He is a hard-working man, and he deserves a wife who gives him undivided attention and care.

Our goals for the weekend once we get home are to get some more of the garden hand-tilled and planted.  I did manage to get a few tomato plants in before it rained a couple of days ago.  I am determined to make do with what we have started from seed this year, not spending any extra on store bought plants.  Hopefully this will show us any adjustments we need to make in our seed starting next year.

We have 21 two-week-old chicks that we incubated and hatched ourselves.  They are cute little fluff balls, but I am ready for them to be out of my living room.  We have 25 meat chickens in the extra part of our chicken coop, and this along with the still-cool nights have kept the chicks in the house for now.  It is a means to an end, so I tolerate it for now.  Jessie does a superb job taking care of them, which helps.

Once I have the greenhouse completely painted and caulked (I may have been avoiding it for the last week or so because of all the bees), we are going to tackle our cellar.  It has a dirt floor, a partial wall of shelves, and not much else but a bunch of junk.  My goal is to clean it all out, have Josh haul gravel to cover the floor, install shop lighting, and eventually put an access stair into the house.  That part will have to come later when we have more time.  I am looking forward to it being more clean and organized and less creepy.

I have some pictures of my garden to post, but my laptop is not cooperating for some reason.  I guess I will share them another time.

We plan on having a family-filled, hard-working weekend, and I hope you all do too!

Blessings,
Debbie

Practical and frugal uses for two common "weeds"

In my quest to become more natural and at the same time more frugal, I have been making a homemade plantain tincture for a facial astringent for several years now.  This is the first year to try and make enough to last until next spring.  Other than the apple cider vinegar to steep the plantain leaves in, the cleaner is free!  Not only free, but extraordinarily effective and just as importantly, TOXIN FREE! 

If you want to save money and also become more natural and eliminate some poisons from your lifestyle, you can make this too.  It isn't difficult at all.  It is best to use raw apple cider vinegar, like the Bragg's brand from the organic section at Kroger, but I have used and still use regular store bought ACV as well.  If you make your own ACV, it is best not to use it for tinctures because the acidity isn't stable or guaranteed with each batch. 

This is what plantain looks like:

I use a quart jar, wash and cut the leaves at least in half before putting them in the jar so the medicinal properties can be released more readily.  Then cover with apple cider vinegar.  This time, I actually added a little tincture grade vodka to top the jars off, which just aids in getting all of the good stuff out of the leaves.  Most commercial astringents also have alcohol in them. 

Shake daily, and let sit at least a few weeks, up to about 6 weeks.  Strain, and store in a bottle or jar of your choice.  It can be kind of strong, so last year I started diluting it with water by half.  We use with both cotton balls and homemade facial cloths.


The second tincture I have been making this spring, inspired by my daughter, is soaking dandelion flowers and leaves in vinegar, along with dried basil, for our salads.  We switched from commercial salad dressings to using olive oil and vinegar most of the time, along with homemade healthy ranch. 

I have three jars of dandelions soaking so far, but I wish I had remembered to start sooner, so I would have gotten more flowers before they seeded out.  Our vinegar will have even more healthy benefits with the added nutrients from the dandelions!  No man made supplement or product can compare to using what you can find in nature provided by God.

Other the being healthier, one of the best things about these two tinctures are that they are practically free to make.  The money saved can be put towards something else that we need that I can't or don't yet make myself.

Try it!  You can do it too!!

Blessings,
Debbie, Home at Serenity Springs (facebook)

Saturday on the Homestead: April 19, 2014

Jeff and I have had a bit of a long, difficult week.  He has been fighting cough and illness all week, and I have been contending with a corresponding lack of sleep.  I normally don't ever wish time away, but both of us were so thankful when Friday got here.

I have planted a few new things today from seeds I have been soaking:  crimson clover, thyme, white yarrow, sweet williams, and some more rhubarb.  Some I planted in my tires, some in a long outside pot, and the rest in my garden. 

I am disappointed that the 10 tomatoes I planted last week all look dead.  We worked hard cultivating those guys from seed.  Success and failure are part of every gardener's life, but it sure is a bummer!  Fortunately, we have more tomatoes almost ready to put in the ground, so I will just try again soon.

One of the things I am not liking about spring are the huge bumblebees dive-bombing our heads whenever we are near the greenhouse.  We have a badminton racket to swat them if they bother us too much.  If they would just peacefully do their thing, I could ignore them more easily, but they are quite aggressive.  I am not afraid of too much, but my husband (and brother-in-law) have been deriving great pleasure from my girly squeals when the bees are pestering me.  They get these manly amused smiles on their faces and I am just glad I can help make their day....

Jessie served us breakfast in bed this morning, which was a wonderful surprise.  She made healthy pancakes with homemade banana whipped cream, turkey bacon, and eggs.  Yummy!! 

I am almost done painting the inside of the greenhouse, and the outside needs one more coat, but here is a picture of the "almost" finished project.  I am SO proud of my husband for designing and building it.  You can barely see our 2 lemon trees inside.

And there is the most beautiful granddaughter in the world, Hadassah Haven Miracle and her dog Willow (she says Lillow).  We went to look at land with Mark, Alix and the kids this morning before we started working. 

Jeff and I are running a load of trash off to town today, and we may indulge in a wee date while we are out.  I know I have said this before, but it is so important to actively cultivate your relationship with your spouse by spending quality and quantity alone time with them when possible.  Jeff and I have worked hard over the years to get where we are, and it hasn't always been good or easy.  But I am thankful we have hung in there and are where we are today: best friends!

I hope you all have a fun, blessed weekend.  We are looking forward to eating dinner with family tomorrow and spending time with them.

Blessings,
Debbie,  Home at Serenity Springs (facebook)

Do you major in the minors? Offering grace to those around us.

I will never be one who minimizes or condones sin in those who call themselves followers of Jesus.  Having said that, there are many people in the Christian faith that have adopted guidelines for themselves and their families and have subsequently turned them into man-made rules that everyone in the faith must follow or we look down upon them as less obedient than us.  To truly be a mature believer, we have to allow others room to set standards for themselves and their families in those things that are not forbidden by God in the Bible.

There are things that are preferences, but are absolutely not salvation issues.  (For by GRACE are you saved through FAITH, and that NOT of YOURSELVES.  It is the GIFT of GOD, not of WORKS, lest any man should BOAST.  Ephesians 2:8-9)  This is important, because everything that we do as an act of obedience is a WORK.  These things don't save us, and because we put on Christ's righteousness when we are saved, they also don't make us any more holy.

There are things in every believer's life that are matters of obedience that we haven't allowed God to work on in our lives yet.   And there are things in other people's lives that are important to them that God may NEVER convict us of, even if we are willing to hear the message and change.

Just because God has convicted us of something doesn't mean that every believer we know will be convicted of it, or perhaps it is not the right time in their walk of faith for them to work on that particular thing.  We all have progress to make to be more like Jesus, and everybody can't work on everything at the same time.  Also, it takes some people much longer to work through issues than others.  Look how stubborn and resistant the Israelites were to change. 

That doesn't mean we can't encourage others to think about certain issues or beliefs that we hold.  It DOES mean we should not engage them to the point of arguments and anger that will put a wall between us and them.  Not only is this counter-productive to relationships, people never change their minds on issues when forced or coerced.

We are friends with people from many different doctrinal viewpoints, some who never go to church but I am almost certain they are saved (this statement will show some of you one of your legalistic points).   Alternately, we know people who are mainstream Christians who go to church every time the door is opened, who are involved in committees, studies, and other various church activities.  We have friends who love Jesus with all their hearts and feel led to keep the Jewish feasts and days. We know believers who worship and have "church" in homes.  We know those who meet outside under a portico, unless it is too cold, and then they all gather in a small upper room above the portico. 

We know others who never cut their hair, and/or only wear skirts for anything including climbing trees and swimming.  Christians who do and some who do not drink alcohol in moderation (This one will definitely snag some.   I know the arguments and scriptures;  not overindulging to the point of drunkenness is the most clear instruction given.  Freedom to let people decide where to go from there is needed to avoid legalism.)  I don't think there is going to be a "He never drank anything", and a "She occasionally had a glass of wine" section in Heaven.

Some believers see nothing wrong with tattoos, while others can make a strong case against them; same thing with body piercings.  We know people who believe you have to be baptized in order to be saved.  People who eat certain things, and people who don't have the freedom to eat certain things. 

Believers who only use certain versions of the Bible, and those who don't care what version they use as long as it is a Bible.    Those who do and those who don't celebrate Christmas, some with and some without Santa Claus. 

We have friends who are as modest as the day is long, and others who let it all hang out without any apparent conviction.  Those who feel led to only take the gospel to certain people groups, and those who want to take it to the whole world.

My family and I have strong convictions on all of the above mentioned areas of life, as I am sure most believers do.  It becomes dangerous when our convictions rule our lives to the point that we begin to shut others out or disdain them because their beliefs on these non-salvation issues don't match ours.  I have seen others suffer this disdain for not living up to someone's beliefs, have experienced it myself from others, and have been tempted to disdain others for not being convicted as I am as well.  This is not a Godly attribute, and we will never fully display God's grace if we act this way. 

I completely understand and agree that in our inner circles we will normally have those who are most like us.  There are other issues to sometimes consider as well.  For example, you have the freedom to be less than perfectly modest, but I may not allow you around my hormonal, pubescent son very much;  however, I am not going to completely unfriend you because of it. 

We can get so dogmatic in our beliefs (again, regarding those things that are not specifically addressed in scripture, or those that are addressed, but specific guidelines not given.  Modesty is addressed in scripture, but the actual level of modesty required is not) that we are more concerned with others following our beliefs than we are about telling others about the great salvation that God  the Father offers us through Jesus.  In the end, these small things may affect our level of reward in Heaven, but they are not going to keep us from getting there.  We need to preach the gospel, and let the Holy Spirit do the convicting and changing of a person's life and heart.

We can forget that we aren't the Holy Spirit, who convicts us of sin and gives us the power to overcome and change.  There is nothing wrong with telling others of our beliefs on these minor (by minor, I mean non-salvation) issues.  However, we need to understand that not everyone has to believe the same way that we do (gasp) on every issue, and that some people who have actually prayerfully considered those same subjects have reached different conclusions than we have, and that is okay.

God is a very big, complex God, and I don't think He wants every single believer to be a carbon copy of each other.  He can use these varying beliefs on minor issues to accomplish His purposes.  He will use you to do one thing, while He may use me to do another, even though we don't agree on anything but how to be saved (!!!)

We don't have the market wrapped up on what is right on every issue.   Great theologians have pondered more serious issues than these, and have come up with vastly differing opinions that they can each support with scripture.  Daily we need to remember that outwardly the gospel is the goal, and within our own lives letting Christ make us more like Him.

One thing Christians can be sure of:  there is salvation only through faith in Jesus Christ and the blood that he shed for us on the cross, and His resurrection.  This is the one and only way to eternal life.  This is a non-negotiable for us because the Bible is absolutely clear on this subject.

There are other issues that scripture address clearly about what is sin:  lying, cheating, stealing, lusting, adultery, homosexuality, murdering, gossiping, slander, and fornication.  We can try to tiptoe around these subjects and convince ourselves that they are okay.  As Christians, we have to accept what is clearly stated in Scripture as sin.  These are the things that we can lovingly address in other believer's lives if we see them stumble.

For those things that are not clearly stated, as those mentioned in the first half of this post, we can grant freedom to the believers around us to prayerfully consider them and reach their own conclusions about them.  Others may not feel convicted about things we feel very strongly about.  They may change their minds someday about those things, or it is possible that we may change our minds about certain things that we now feel strongly about. 

Instead of anger and rejection towards others who don't feel convicted about all of the same things that we do, let us offer grace, realizing that we are not always right, and also realizing that even if we are right, that it isn't our job to change them.  We can pray for them, but we can't do the changing.

Let us walk through life humbly living out our beliefs, speaking of them humbly when given the chance, without the expectation that everyone must follow and agree on these minor issues, even if those "minor issues" seem very large and important to us.

Stand firm on Christ as the way to salvation; stand firm on those things God has clearly stated as sin;  offer GRACE for everything else.

As always, please SHARE this post with others.

Blessings,
Debbie, Home at Serenity Springs (Facebook page)